Top 100 Chuck Norris Facts

[JimMayor007]

1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
2. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
3. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
4. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
5. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
6. Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
7. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
8. Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
9. Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a ********** Indian.
10. In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.

...read all 100 Chuck Norris Facts with pics Here

 

[CuongNhuka]

I love those. My fav. is the one about Chuck giving Jesus the gift of beard.

 

[bushidomartialarts]

Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about.

 

[charyuop]

LMAO Chuck ordered a Big Mac at Burger King...and got one.

 

[Carol]

********** SPOILER ALERT *************





















Chuck Norris killed Lord Voldemort on page 744.

 

[Drac]

I love those. My fav. is the one about Chuck giving Jesus the gift of beard.

Same here...

 

[CuongNhuka]

Same here...

Drac, High Five Man!

-Holds hand up for a high five-

 

[arnisador]

I like the one that goes like this: There is no theory of evolution--just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

 

[bydand]

Chuck Norris killed Lord Voldemort on page 744.

:lfao: Love it!

 

[Dave Leverich]

One thing I love about these is Chuck himself, when I went to the premeire of the WCL, they were doing Chuck Norris jokes... And he just grinned. I mean, that said a lot about the man behind the beard.

 

[KempoGuy06]

This is my kind of thread.

The best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup but knowing that Chuck Norris didnt kill you in your sleep

For more Chuck Norris facts check my sig. There is a link to a web site

B

 

[CuongNhuka]

The question of what happens when an unstopable force meets an unmovable object will be answered on Friday August 3rd, at 10:49. Chuck Noris will punch him self the fa...

-We're sorry, but the result of Chuck Norris punching himself in the face has caused a World-Ending explosition, killing us all. We're sorry-