The rank below white belt

[StudentCarl]

The rank below white belt is "I can't" (I would rather die than try.)

Last night we had a relatively young guest in class. I was assigned to guide him through stretching before class and help from beside him, as needed, during class. To make a long story short, during the early part of class one of the physical warmups we do is duck walks. He tried about 3 steps and sat down. All attempts to encourage/coax/direct were met with "I can't". He wasn't hurt; it was more that the reality of class didn't match his expectation of it and how he would do (he had told me right away that he already knew a load of moves and figured he'd start with a high belt).
Both the 2nd dan assistant instructor and master talked with him to no avail. After he sat and refused to move for about 5 minutes, my master told him to go off the floor and sit with his family.
I've always known that the white belt symbolizes the blank slate of one who has not learned. This was a reminder that wearing a white belt also says you have an open mind and want to learn. Not everyone makes it to that point.

 

[puunui]

To make a long story short, during the early part of class one of the physical warmups we do is duck walks.

Not to defend this person, but I have been told that duck walks are really bad for your knees.

 

[StudentCarl]

They're sure not easy for mine. Perhaps someday I will be the instructor and choose differently. I had an indicator too when we did planks. He mostly stayed up but moaned while looking around to see who noticed. I haven't seen 9 year old boys moan before in that kind of situation. He was athletic enough to bounce around before class with other kids his age. I'm pretty sure this was a case of reality not matching with his expectations...so he didn't want any part of it. I find that pretty uncommon in kids, most of whom will give at least some effort. In this case, his grandmother said he had asked to come and try Taekwondo. With effort I can help a student grow in Taekwondo. Without effort he's choosing a different lesson.

 

[miguksaram]

The kid reminds me of the saying "Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die." In his case they saying should be "Everybody wants to be a ninja, but no one wants to do a front kick."

I think you nailed when you said he expected to be welcomed at a top rank and found out that he had to actually work to get that rank. Oh well...you will find out soon enough if he stays or goes.

 

[ATC]

Hmmm...There are better ways to go about giving an intro lesson into TKD than having someone do duck walks as their first lesson. It would be hard pressed to keep many new students if that is what each would do every time they came into the door. Not the best intro lesson for new students regardless of their past experience.

At 9 years old most kids want things to be fun. You need to hide the work inside something fun, most definitely for a beginner. Plus not to mention that it's hard, even for seasoned students. Beginners need to build up. Maybe 4 steps of a duck walk then roll and get up and run to the end of the mat and punch a target 10 times would be good enough for a trial lesson.

I have seen too many trial lessons never come back because of just this kind of thing.

 

[Phenix_Rider]

I have seen too many trial lessons never come back because of just this kind of thing.

Maybe it's better that way. If you can't hack it, better to find out early.

 

[StudentCarl]

Hmmm...There are better ways to go about giving an intro lesson into TKD than having someone do duck walks as their first lesson. It would be hard pressed to keep many new students if that is what each would do every time they came into the door. Not the best intro lesson for new students regardless of their past experience.

At 9 years old most kids want things to be fun. You need to hide the work inside something fun, most definitely for a beginner. Plus not to mention that it's hard, even for seasoned students. Beginners need to build up. Maybe 4 steps of a duck walk then roll and get up and run to the end of the mat and punch a target 10 times would be good enough for a trial lesson.

I have seen too many trial lessons never come back because of just this kind of thing.

I understand your point, but my impression was that if the game-ender wasn't duck walks it would have been something else. I want everyone to be successful, but if you lower your expectations far enough, people will lower themselves to meet them. I've seen kids struggle before, and we praise their efforts--whatever they do is good enough at first as we can build on it. Over time and with effort everyone becomes more capable. You only fail if you steadfastly refuse to try, but that is always an option. It needs to be, otherwise success is a lie.

 

[andyjeffries]

I've seen kids struggle before, and we praise their efforts--whatever they do is good enough at first as we can build on it. Over time and with effort everyone becomes more capable.

I've recently been watching the Gracie Bullyproof DVD series and this is very much their philosophy (along with "The Perfect Adjustment"). Praise them when they try and they'll keep trying (and naturally get better). Seems to sound good (and it's worked with my kids when we've played the first few Gracie Games) so I'm going to try bringing it to my Taekwondo club when I start it (my instructor is more of a "no news is good news" type of guy ).

 

[golfermatt]

I happen to attend the same school as Carl and was witness to the event. The youth beginner class (5-8) features about 15-20 minutes of similar "gym class" types of activities with a focus on those that can be useful in TKD(Frog hops, high knees, Mario Jumps). The majority of the children absolutely love this part of the class. It is also a wonderful way to engage and entertain really young ones who have a very short attention span. I would say for an 8year boy to walk about 30feet like a duck(many even quack) is hardly torture. The child was also attending a regular class, I do not think the class structure needs to be changed or altered to give an sugar coated or unrealistic example to entice a potential student.
It should be noted that Carl is a Teacher by trade and pretty good at evaluating youth. I think that it falls in to the ever growing epidemic of lax parenting. As a golf instructor myself, I see this all too often with my students. It is far too common that parents allow their children to give up,withhold effort or just plane act poorly with very little consequences. As this child was so young I would be a little more critical of the parents, it not the first time this has happened either. If its a cry for help from the parents, send the kid back and let the instructors have at him!!
I think the point Carl was making though is valid, you have to be willing to learn or perhaps you should not be worthy of a white belt.

 

[granfire]

We had a kid like that in the program at one time.

Things were fine when he was in the little tigers. He did well in the format, so he got moved up to the regular junior class, being 6 years old, and on the big side.
And all hell broke lose!
There was no more effort to be had from that child, he would goof off, disturb the class...the push ups assign as punishment looked like a hapless meal worm struggling for cover, pitiful! We switch him to doing jumping jacks, with little success, but at least that got him off the floor, and took his belt.

And oh wonders, he improved...until we allowed him to get the belt back... POOF gone... mom let him quit...

Parents need to grow a spine, I swear! It would make it a lot easier for the rest of us, parents and instructors alike.

 

[troubleenuf]

Duck walks are the #1 reason people who trained "back in the day" have bad knees and many had to quit training. There are many better exercises that you could use to accomplish the same thing without putting that much pressure on the knees. Just because you always USED to do them dosnt mean you still should.

Not to defend this person, but I have been told that duck walks are really bad for your knees.

 

[granfire]

Duck walks are the #1 reason people who trained "back in the day" have bad knees and many had to quit training. There are many better exercises that you could use to accomplish the same thing without putting that much pressure on the knees. Just because you always USED to do them dosnt mean you still should.

Well, true enough, but I think it is just a symptom, not the reason a kid would quit and refuse.

Many exercises we used to do have fallen out of fashion, I think the 'mountain climber' has been taken off the PT regiment for the armed forces some time back...

Didn't the lid moan at the 'plank' as well?

Those are exercises that are immidiately straining, not to mention you look stupid doing the waddle
A lot of kids these days do not get to move about as we used to, but their heads are filled with those images of kick butt super heroes.

 

[shesulsa]

One class is enough to tell you everything you need to know?

1. It's possible he's physically weak and these are actually difficult for him.
2. So it wasn't what he expected ... after a few more classes he might warm up.
3. Perhaps he could gain confidence with encouragement and teacher effort.
4. Every kid is different.
5. Be true to your teaching style.

If teaching a challenging kid like this is not for you, then I think it's best to admit it and move forward. Blaming a child for being who they are and blaming parents for falling down on their duties is not productive. You can either strive to make the difference in that child's life with a long-time investment and realistic expectations on your part or dismiss him as not worth your precious time.

Who needs to learn the immediate gratification lesson here again?

 

[ATC]

Maybe it's better that way. If you can't hack it, better to find out early.

This statement really makes no sense at all. Cheyenne Lewis was told she could not hack it early also. Go figure.:shrug:

 

[shesulsa]

This statement really makes no sense at all. Cheyenne Lewis was told she could not hack it early also. Go figure.:shrug:

The list of massive successes who failed earlier in life is long. Longer, though, is the list of educated dolts.

 

[Archtkd]

Not to defend this person, but I have been told that duck walks are really bad for your knees.

Yep. You pay for it at a certain age.

 

[granfire]

This statement really makes no sense at all. Cheyenne Lewis was told she could not hack it early also. Go figure.:shrug:

I think being told not being able to be successful is different from not even trying.

 

[ATC]

I think being told not being able to be successful is different from not even trying.

True, but you also have to be able to motivate. There have been many that did not try or think they could not do, but with the right coaxing or motivation they learn that they can do. To tell someone that they can't and at such an early stage tells me that the teacher is the lazy one. It is easy to teach the ones that already can do or already know they can.

 

[Carol]

"Not trying" sounds an attribute that applies more to the instructors that are giving up on a child 5 minutes in to his first time on the mat.

 

[granfire]

well, considering that there are more than one kid in class, seems not fair to dwell too much on one kid who does not want.

Some people are not motivatable. And if that is (quiet possibly) an ingrained behavior, rewarded by the parents and grandparents, you as paid clown won't do much difference in 5 minutes. After all, as MA instructor you don't sign up to motivate those who don't want to be there, since we enjoy the workout and our time at the center.