Parents role???

Gorilla

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What should a parents role be in the development of their child in Martial Arts???

In your opinion do they have a role???

If so what is a parents optimal involvement???
 

terryl965

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To encourage and make sure they are at practice when they should be. One thing alot of parent forget is to keep them up with good equipment and make sur ethey appreciate everything.
 

NPTKD

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To encourage and make sure they are at practice when they should be. One thing alot of parent forget is to keep them up with good equipment and make sur ethey appreciate everything.
And pay on time..LOL!:boing2:
 

granfire

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And pay on time..LOL!:boing2:


and drop the kid off on time...

Parents are Go-fers, equipment managers, personal assistents, shoulder to cry on, drill instructor and nurse.

Oh, a the gold pooping donkey....

It really depends on the system you are running. If you have a full scale competition team, parents are more involved than ITA parents are.

I made sure my kid had his gear and brought him on time (plus paying on time....) but I never made him practice outside of class (heck, I hardly did, don't want to be a hypocrit here)

If the parents are not into it, the kid won't stay long.
 

ATC

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The more the parent is involved the better the kid. I was always involved in my kids training. I am not saying that they are the best cause I know they are not, but they are the best in our dojang for their age.

I do see others trying to imitate what I do with mine and their kids are pretty good to. However they don't have my experience and can only imitate what they see. They have no ideal what goes on out side the dojang. I know when to push, when to let up and when to just give them time off.

OH yeah to answer the question
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sorry. Each parent will have a different role depending on what each is looking for or not looking for. So some just want little Johnny to do something other than play DS all day so there role is what others have already stated. Yet others have a different reason for their kids being enrolled. So the rolls will vary from parent to parent.
 

goingd

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Other than making sure everything is on time (showing up, paying) I find it incredibly important for parents to, well, be parents! Parents who discipline their kids as little as possible are not only making things worse for themselves, but they are making things almost impossible for instructors. Parents shouldn't be like a screaming football coach, and neither should we, but no matter how good and patient we are, discipline is still the parents' primary job.
 

ACJ

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I think parents need to be realistic, as one of their many jobs. In particular, parents that make their kids do martial arts because they want them to be disciplined hardly ever realise that even though most of the places they will send them to will promote discipline. But 1-3 hours a week of us saying "Stand in line, stand up straight, neaten your uniforms, listen to the instructor, pay attention" isn't going to counteract parenting like "Clean your room." "no" "fine, i'll do it." or anything even close to that.
 

goingd

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Several of the young parents I've worked with have expected Taekwondo to be a replacement for discipline not given at home. After a few weeks some have literally gotten confused as to why the magic discipline fairy that is martial arts hasn't "worked".
 

Jade Tigress

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Several of the young parents I've worked with have expected Taekwondo to be a replacement for discipline not given at home. After a few weeks some have literally gotten confused as to why the magic discipline fairy that is martial arts hasn't "worked".


You took the words right out of my mouth. I have seen this far too many times and was about to post the same. :asian: Discipline begins at home.
 

granfire

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Unfortunately, this parent generation is the second removed from old Prussian principles of discipline. Precious syndrome etc.

As long as the parents are not working against what you do in the Dojang, they can awe at the discipline we get on the floor.
 

Tez3

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A parents job is to send their daughter to martial arts class and when she had the fifth coughing fit of the session and I've sat her out because she's clearly unwell, the child tells me she's been off school sick all week. When the mother comes back to pick her up she tells me, laughing, that her three youngest have swine flu, cheers! That was last Thursday, guess who is typing this with a headache and a sore throat threatening.
 

granfire

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A parents job is to send their daughter to martial arts class and when she had the fifth coughing fit of the session and I've sat her out because she's clearly unwell, the child tells me she's been off school sick all week. When the mother comes back to pick her up she tells me, laughing, that her three youngest have swine flu, cheers! That was last Thursday, guess who is typing this with a headache and a sore throat threatening.


HAHAHAHA...no, seriously, you didn't slap her silly? Send her the bill to have the gym desinfected! Seriously! some people don't get it. (Get yourself some tamiflu or whatever this stuff is called over yonder. I am sure you fall into the category who have no problems and complications to fear, but why suffer....)

Hope you get to feeling better!
 
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Gorilla

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If you have a student/athlete who has allot of talent and dedication and the parents are willing to support this how much do you partner with the parent to insure that the child reaches his optimal potential???

What are the pluses?

What are the drawbacks?
 

shesulsa

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A parents job is to send their daughter to martial arts class and when she had the fifth coughing fit of the session and I've sat her out because she's clearly unwell, the child tells me she's been off school sick all week. When the mother comes back to pick her up she tells me, laughing, that her three youngest have swine flu, cheers! That was last Thursday, guess who is typing this with a headache and a sore throat threatening.

Jeez. The less intelligent walk among us. *lord*

If you have a student/athlete who has allot of talent and dedication and the parents are willing to support this how much do you partner with the parent to insure that the child reaches his optimal potential???

I teach very young children right now, but I'll work with someone I think I can help with extra time and one-on-one attention. If their talent is beyond my ability to foster, though, I'll try to call in my teacher or a colleague who can help guide them further. I think you have to communicate honestly with the parents and find out what they would like to see happen for their child and make yourself available to them.

What are the pluses?

What are the drawbacks?

I'm not exactly sure what you're asking here - I assume you're asking either *what are the pros and cons to partnering with the parents for supporting a very talented student OR *what are the pros and cons to pushing a very talented student.

Pros are having a hand in helping a child grow - if a person can't reap the benefit of witnessing success in another person, I really can't know what to say. The cons would be, of course, betrayal, blaming if the child fails or gets injured, loss of a "star student" and potential fallout from that in the business.
 
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Gorilla

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Jeez. The less intelligent walk among us. *lord*



I teach very young children right now, but I'll work with someone I think I can help with extra time and one-on-one attention. If their talent is beyond my ability to foster, though, I'll try to call in my teacher or a colleague who can help guide them further. I think you have to communicate honestly with the parents and find out what they would like to see happen for their child and make yourself available to them.



I'm not exactly sure what you're asking here - I assume you're asking either *what are the pros and cons to partnering with the parents for supporting a very talented student OR *what are the pros and cons to pushing a very talented student.

Pros are having a hand in helping a child grow - if a person can't reap the benefit of witnessing success in another person, I really can't know what to say. The cons would be, of course, betrayal, blaming if the child fails or gets injured, loss of a "star student" and potential fallout from that in the business.

I am asking what are the pro's and con's of partnering with parents of a talented student/athlete. It can be real life experience or opinion. I am looking for a thought out lively dialog around a topic that can be helpful for parent and instructor. These relationships are very important for everyone involved and getting feedback on both good and bad partnerships will be helpful for improvement of the parent instructor relationship.
 

cmassman

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I think the parents should be supportive and look out for the best interest of the child. I don't think there is anything wrong with a partent asking an insturcture a question or bring up a concern you have about something going on in class.

Parents should also help the child set reasonable goals. My son though it would be cool to be on the Junior National team. I sat him down and explain to him what it would take. At a mimium practicing 3 - 4 hours a day, giving up pretty much all other activities, spending less time with his friends. I didn't tell him he couldn't do it but I wanted him to be aware of what it would take. I told him I would support him if that's what he wanted. He thought about it and decided he didn't want to turn TKD into a job and would rather just enjoy it and go to a few local tournaments and have a life outside of TKD.
 

cmassman

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I am asking what are the pro's and con's of partnering with parents of a talented student/athlete. It can be real life experience or opinion. I am looking for a thought out lively dialog around a topic that can be helpful for parent and instructor. These relationships are very important for everyone involved and getting feedback on both good and bad partnerships will be helpful for improvement of the parent instructor relationship.

I this case I think partnering with a parent has alot of pro's. All the responsibility doesn't have to be on the instructor. The key has to be how well you can get along with the parents. You guys would have to have clearly defined roles so you don't give mixed signals to the student/athlete. I you can work that out you have a much better chance for success. If not, this is one gaint diaster waiting to happen
 

tshadowchaser

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I'll skip over reading the other post and just give my thoughts. Please forgive me if I say what others have.

Parents should encourage their children todo their best without pushing them

Parents that study with their children should help them but not push them or be over bearing

Parents should at times talk with the instructor about what his/her expectations are but not try to influence the instructor.

Parents should watch class in a respectful manner and know that the instructor has a class to watch not just their child

Parents should be understanding of the limitations of their child

Parents should understand that it is the learning not the belt that counts
 

chrispillertkd

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Parents have the same role in their children's Martial Arts education as they do in every other aspect of their children's life; parents are the primary educators of their children.

In this sense, Martial Arts instructors are there to reinforce the education the parent should already be giving to their children. I do not mean, of course, that the arents teach their kids the physical techniques of a particular MA style. I mean, rather, that the education the parents are giving their children in courtesy, integrity, perserverence, self-control, and indomitable spirit as well as in things such as humility, respect, etiquette,etc. is going to be reviewed, reinforced and perhaps emphasized more in a martial arts class.

If anything is taught in the martial arts class that contradicts the child's education by his parents it mus give way, if need be by the removal of the child from the class. (The MA instructor does, after all, have the right to teach what he desires just as the parents have a right to educate their child as they desire.) All things being equal there should be little if any conflict between the lessons learned at a MA school and what the parents are teaching their children, IMNSHO.

Yes, I realize that is not always the case. But it certainly should be.

Pax,

Chris
 

ATC

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I am asking what are the pro's and con's of partnering with parents of a talented student/athlete. It can be real life experience or opinion. I am looking for a thought out lively dialog around a topic that can be helpful for parent and instructor. These relationships are very important for everyone involved and getting feedback on both good and bad partnerships will be helpful for improvement of the parent instructor relationship.
Still not sure of the why and what you are asking for. When you say "partner with the parent", what does that mean? Does the parent take MA with the child? Is the parent a higher ranked belt than the child? It is one thing to have a parent that is involved in the MA and understands some of the subtleties and nuances. But a parent that is not involved in MA and has no understanding of many of the whys, what’s, and how comes of what we do can be a different thing in itself. Then you will find yourself training both the parent and the child. Even though there is some of this anyway, if the parent has not MA experience at all then you may find yourself doing more parent teaching than child teaching.

Please explain the nature of the question as it may give a better idea of what you are looking for.
 

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