My two students are texting next december

[Manny]

On december 18 my two students going have examination to white advance belt (white with yellow tip) maybe just maybe one of them (Arthur) could go for the full yellow belt, they started on TKD last september.

My class sterted with 6 men but only two remain till these days, of these two men only Arthur shows discipline, the other guy I don't really know why he's coming to train, this man has one boy who trains regulary and he asked dad to enrole in TKD classes, however I really don't get why he shows up to class vagely (not regulary) and he complains about almost everithing, if we do crunches he complains about the quantity, if we jog in ther mat for about 10 minutes he complains, if we do a,ot of stretching he complains and complains and complains in a softh way but complains.

I wanted to know why this guy enroled in TKD, because: a) If he comes to TKD classes to get in shape he does not work hard to get this and he need it desesperately belive me, b) if he comes beacuse his son asked him, he does not put some kind of effort, and c) I don't think he liked martial arts anyway. So I really don't know why this guy does TKD.

In the other hand Arthur got inside TKD because he wants to exercise and think training and learning TKD can be positive, Arthur always come on time to the class, do the best he can and he's very enthusiatic about learning.

We (two pupìls and I) must to reinforce some concepts and practice+practice+practice to do the kichos well and to polish a little the techs, Arthur is not a problem, the other guy will need to come on time and do his best to get his kyu grading.

Manny

 

[Cirdan]

Complaining and whining is a way of life to many. It often go hand in hand with the need to brag about something. "I do MA, I am tough"

 

[StudentCarl]

How do you respond to this complaining?

 

[granfire]

How do you respond to this complaining?

with an SMS?

 

[Manny]

How do you respond to this complaining?

Asking him to do the best. Pushing him in a polite way, like when joging I took him by the shoulder and jog side by side to him (because he is walking not joging), do the crunches with him and let him to know that when he stops or quits we will continue and don't stop (no matter the abs pain) till he reasumes the crunches.

However I have not talked rought yet to him cause this guy it's a client of my sambonim, I mean his boy and he are students of my master's dojo and don't want him to quit and take his son out of my sambonim's dojang.

Maybe it's time to ask comitment from him in some other way.

Manny

 

[Manny]

with an SMS?

Oh I sorry my post says texting instead of testing (do a test or examination) forgive my bad english... jajajajajajajaja.

Manny

 

[StudentCarl]

I suppose it's harder to establish as much of a class climate with only two students, but my experience is that effective instructors address complaining behaviors and focus students on giving their best efforts. I've heard my master tell people to 'suffer in silence' and label whining/complaining/groaning as 'victim noises', adding that victim noises are the kind of things that attract and encourage predators...if you do such a thing you're drawing in or encouraging anyone who wants to dominate you. You've shown you're vulnerable.

It's also important to praise perseverence and strong effort when you see it, particularly when it's from a student with weak or inconsistent effort.

Not to hijack, but the issue of complaining/whining students is an interesting one.

 

[StudentCarl]

Manny,
It sounds like your situation is more challenging than normal because your student may have a special relationship with your sabonim. Perhaps you could ask your sabonim his advice.

 

[granfire]

Oh I sorry my post says texting instead of testing (do a test or examination) forgive my bad english... jajajajajajajaja.

Manny

LOL. sorry. :angel: could not help myself.
(no worries, I trip over myself plenty of times and no, your English is very good. )

 

[Daniel Sullivan]

Oh I sorry my post says texting instead of testing (do a test or examination) forgive my bad english... jajajajajajajaja.

Manny

I was all geared up to tell you to make them practice breaking on their phones. Shucks.

Daniel

 

[jthomas1600]

Yeah, I thought this was going to be something like "my students are texting during class, what do I do?". jajajaja

Anyway Manny, I don't really have any advice as to what to do about the complainer. In fact this may sound harsh, but I wouldn't suggest expending too much of your energy trying to change the guy. He's an adult and can/will decide on his own weather he wants to give it his all or not. Rather than exhaust myself trying to motivate him, I would invest my energy in the student who obviously wants to be there.

 

[Earl Weiss]

My 2 cents.
1. Tell the Sa Bum about the problem and suggest a plan of action.
2. Suggested plan of action. Tell the guy you are not sure why he is there, but at least he's there. So, while he's there he can at least pretend to be trying and shut the frack up so as not to contaminate the atmosphere for the entire class with his negativity.

 

[StudentCarl]

...I wouldn't suggest expending too much of your energy trying to change the guy. He's an adult and can/will decide on his own weather he wants to give it his all or not...

Actually, this might be the wisest and most strategic approach: ignore the complaining (unless it's out-of-control) and praise the other student without lowering your expectations. Don't waste your breath on his complaints unless they bother the one other student. Your complainer will either change over time or show himself the door. I do think it's important to praise real effort when you see it though...that continues to reinforce what you want more of.

Carl

 

[Daniel Sullivan]

My 2 cents.
1. Tell the Sa Bum about the problem and suggest a plan of action.
2. Suggested plan of action. Tell the guy you are not sure why he is there, but at least he's there. So, while he's there he can at least pretend to be trying and shut the frack up so as not to contaminate the atmosphere for the entire class with his negativity.

What he said.

Daniel

 

[granfire]

Complaining and whining is a way of life to many. It often go hand in hand with the need to brag about something. "I do MA, I am tough"

Yeah, I thought this was going to be something like "my students are texting during class, what do I do?". jajajaja

Anyway Manny, I don't really have any advice as to what to do about the complainer. In fact this may sound harsh, but I wouldn't suggest expending too much of your energy trying to change the guy. He's an adult and can/will decide on his own weather he wants to give it his all or not. Rather than exhaust myself trying to motivate him, I would invest my energy in the student who obviously wants to be there.

My 2 cents.
1. Tell the Sa Bum about the problem and suggest a plan of action.
2. Suggested plan of action. Tell the guy you are not sure why he is there, but at least he's there. So, while he's there he can at least pretend to be trying and shut the frack up so as not to contaminate the atmosphere for the entire class with his negativity.

(actually trying to be constructive for a change )

All of the above. Some people don't even realize anymore how much they whine. They might not even mean it in that way, but it sure gets mighty old in a hurry.

Since he does not bless you with his presence all the time I don't think I would exert myself for him emotionally.
I don't think he will last long, after all, whitebelt is just crawling, it does not get easier from there.

 

[ralphmcpherson]

When people complain, I like to put a positive spin on it. If there's one thing Ive learnt its that nothing that gets results is easy and pain is the result of getting results, so if someone complains I generally tell them thats good because you are obviously working hard and results will come. If they are not complaining they musn't be working hard enough. It usually shuts them up pretty quickly because they are only complaining so you will let them stop so if you are positive about the complaining they pretty quickly understand that its not working.