Martial Arts and cars, trucks, and SUVs question

Daniel Sullivan

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On page seven of this thread:
http://www.martialtalk.com/forum/showthread.php?t=72177&page=7
a bit of automotive thread drift occurred.

Being a car nut, I was inspired to start a silly thread, though perhaps not so silly, depending on who is responding. I'm always fond of using automotive analogies, and maybe some others are as well, so here goes.

What kind of cars do different MA's correspond to?

For example, the BMW 3-series acts as a compact passenger car, often fares well in comparison tests with sports cars and really drives like a GT. I'd class it as the Hapkido of the automotive world.

The Cadillac Escalade, on the other hand, is big, bold, and brash, full of glitz and glamour, and outweighs any car by a substantial amount. But it packs a 7.0 LS-7 V-8 with gobbs of stump pulling torque. The Hummer H-2 shares the same platform and engine, but is much more purpose built. These two are pro wrestlers; the Escalade being the flashy face and the H-2 being more like the rough heel in black with a sleeve (think Undertaker).

So what is your take on my silly question? There are as many MA's as there are cars, so have at!

Daniel
 

terryl965

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Well then TKD would be a Porsche 911 Turbo, because of all the lighting fast kicks.
 

terryl965

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Judo would be like a Perterbelt Mac truck with all the power they have.
 
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Daniel Sullivan

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Cadillac CTS-V: 556 horsepower, 551 pounds/ft of torque, 0-60 in 3.9 seconds, quarter mile in 12 seconds at 118 mph, top speed of 191 mph, .93 g's on the skidpad, 60-0 in 166 feet, and remarkable handling. Room for five in coddled comfort, high style, and exlucivity, this is the Celebrity MMA-ist of the automotive world with a base art of wrestling.

This classical wrestler sports an old school two valve V8 and the car weighs in at 4200 pounds, but this Caddy has crosstrained in Wushu(stabilitrac, magnasteer, direct injection, cylinder deactivation), boxing (forced induction), and kyokushin karate (Tremec 6 speed manual transmission) and Aikido (killer suspension, forged aluminum wheels, massive grippy tires).

A bold personality and a winning record won this Caddy a trip to Hollywood, where it stars in martial arts movies.

Daniel
 
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Daniel Sullivan

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Interesting. I would have picked the Civic for ninjutsu; looks like an economy car, but has better than average performance, fine handling, and can be tricked out to the extent that it can hang with more expensive performance cars (like say, a 240SX)without changing the exterior appearance, thus keeping allowing the police eyes to focus on that same 240SX.

Daniel
 

Steve

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First, I hope this is taken in the spirit intended, which is tongue firmly in cheek. :D

BJJ is a Subaru Impreza WRC - very, very good at what it's designed to do. Powerful and nimble and well built.

TKD &#8211; Classic Jaguar E type. Long, lean and underpowered. A beautiful and impressive car best suited for women. ;)
Judo &#8211; Dodge Ram 3500 &#8211; big, strong and powerful.
Ninjutsu &#8211; Mini Cooper &#8211; not quite a sports car&#8230; let&#8217;s call it a sporty car. Weak on the straights, but agile through the bends.
Hapkido &#8211; Subaru Outback &#8211; jack of all trades.
 

Steve

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Interesting. I would have picked the Civic for ninjutsu; looks like an economy car, but has better than average performance, fine handling, and can be tricked out to the extent that it can hang with more expensive performance cars (like say, a 240SX)without changing the exterior appearance, thus keeping allowing the police eyes to focus on that same 240SX.

Daniel
Ninjutsu couldn't really be stealth. Have you seen the ninjas? That's the point. You can't miss them.

But if you're making this argument, I'd suggest the BMW M3. A real sleeper. Only people who know cars know how fast they are. Otherwise, they look very much like any other "sports" sedan.
 
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Daniel Sullivan

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First, I hope this is taken in the spirit intended, which is tongue firmly in cheek. :D

BJJ is a Subaru Impreza WRC - very, very good at what it's designed to do. Powerful and nimble and well built.

TKD – Classic Jaguar E type. Long, lean and underpowered. A beautiful and impressive car best suited for women. ;)
Judo – Dodge Ram 3500 – big, strong and powerful.
Ninjutsu – Mini Cooper – not quite a sports car… let’s call it a sporty car. Weak on the straights, but agile through the bends.
Hapkido – Subaru Outback – jack of all trades.
I don't know that I'd say that TKD is underpowered or best suited to women, but I love the E-type and TKD Vee-neck doboks look great on women.:D

I'd have put the WRX into MMA with the base art of BJJ, but again, I like it!:)

Daniel
 
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Daniel Sullivan

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Ninjutsu couldn't really be stealth. Have you seen the ninjas? That's the point. You can't miss them.

But if you're making this argument, I'd suggest the BMW M3. A real sleeper. Only people who know cars know how fast they are. Otherwise, they look very much like any other "sports" sedan.
Interesting. I gave hapkido to the M-3, though I can definitely see it on the Subaru Outback.

Daniel
 
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Daniel Sullivan

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I'm going to give KKW taekwondo to the Chevy Cobalt/Pontiac G5. Same platform and body, just different nose and tail. The chasis and body structure are taught and have excellent tortional stiffness and the simple strut front/twist beam rear suspension, even on the base car, is well tuned.

Nimble and quick, it is affordable to the regular consumer and readily available, just at taekwondo is readily available and convenient at the nearby mini-mall

And there's a trim level to match the various iterations of TKD.

Average mini-mall TKD: The base car: 150 horse 2.2, hitting 60 in about eight and a half seconds, 25mpg around town, 35 highway. In its base form, it performs well enough, but not the strongest competitor. Provides a good base for a tuner, just as your average mini-mall TKD provides a good base for either advanced SD or advanced competition training.

Advanced TKD yudanja with a focus on practical SD: Pontiac G5-GT. It has 2.4 liter 175 horse four cylinder, 17" mags with 208/50-ZR17 Pirellis, a sport tuned suspension, all leather interior, four wheel discs, and a sleek body with a nice dobok (body kit and wing). A good all around car that sports good economy and good performance (virtually identical acceleration 7.5 to 60 and 15.4 through the quarter mile to a 1969 Z/28). Not the greatest track car, but in terms of usable performance on the street, it is excellent (I speak first hand, as I drive one). Lots of room for upgrades i.e. advanced training, but a solid performer as-is, with real world 24 mpg around town to boot.

Top level Olympic TKD: Cobalt SS. This supercharged compact has a 260 horse 2.0 four cylinder. 0-60 times are in the fives. This thing kicks hard, with tight handling and strong acceleration. Nothing subtle about the body either. This is the competition dobok with racing stripes and patches, the top of the line hogu, and a black belt with at least three stitched stripes.

Sheesh! I've seriously overthought this!

Daniel
 

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Tai Chi is a 1967 VW Karmann Ghia - With a whopping 60 hp, it's very slow, but looks pretty dang cool. Driven now largely by senior citizens, it's rare to see one on which everything functions as originally designed.

WC is a classic Mini Cooper S. Beloved by those who... well, love them. Looked at as an oddity by everyone else. Steady, great through the corners and even though it has very small engines and very little room, it still wins races, such as the 1964 Monte Carlo. It's the classic tortoise beating the much more powerful Fords, Saabs and Citreons. Still, it DOES look funny. :)
 

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