Kenpo Baseball

[twinkletoes]

ATTN: DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU HAVE NO SENSE OF HUMOR.
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

--

My baseball coach teaches "kenpo baseball." I'm a purple belt in "kenpo baseball."

The other day, in a game, I was on 2nd when my teammate hit one way into the outfield. I ran for third base, but the ball was caught, and I went back towards 2nd to tag up, but the outfielder had thrown the ball towards 2nd, and the baseman tagged the base and I was out.

The next day my coach and I talked about this. I was disappointed in my inability to correctly run from 2nd. He had me practice "Running from Second, A,B,C,D,and E" over and over by myself.

Running from Second A: Teammate pops a fly. Start to run, but it lands foul and you trot back to 2nd.

Running from Second B: Teammate hits a grounder that eludes the infielders. Sprint to 3rd. [Running from 3rd is a later extension...grafting is later]

Running from Second C: Teammate hits one into the outfield, ball is caught. Tag up on 2nd, and run to 3rd [then see B]

Running from Second D: Teammate hits one into the outfield, ball is not caught. Sprint to 3rd [see B]

Running from Second E: 2 outs, man on 1st. Run on anything.


By practicing each of these 100 times, and making sure I visualized each time, I practiced my running from 2nd all day long. At next week's game I will feel better prepared for running from second base.

My Kenpo Baseball coach would like to proudly point out a couple things:

1) Kenpo Baseball training covers just about every variable possible in the game. Some other coaches train their players differently, but we have all the same tactics that they do on the field.

2) Just the other day we were watching the game and we saw real professional players using our techniques: I saw someone combine Hitting it into the Outfield C with Running from 1st E and Running from 3rd A to bring in 3 runs. This stuff really works!

---

Stop now and laugh.

~TT

 

[roryneil]

I went to your website and you list BJJ, modern arnis and krav maga, but when you enter the site there is a kenpo flag right there top left. What the dilio?

(I'm just harrasing you, don't get upset)

 

[twinkletoes]

I will answer that via private message, rather than let the controversies spill into this thread as well (not that this post won't get some funny comments...)

~Chris

 

[Seig]

Well twinkletoes,
It seems that even though I have a well known sense of humor, I find none in your post. I find it positvely insulting.
Congratulations.

 

[MJS]

Originally posted by Seig
Well twinkletoes,
It seems that even though I have a well known sense of humor, I find none in your post. I find it positvely insulting.
Congratulations.

Actually, I don't blame him a bit. Considering how some topics usually end up turning out, I would do the same thing.

MJS

 

[twinkletoes]

Seig,

I'm sorry you take offense. It isn't meant with any hostility.

I read a story a long time ago that was similar, except it was supposed to be people in Japan who were dressing up as cowboys. The practiced facing off and drawing toy guns, at which point the "sheriff" remained standing, and the "varmint" fell down. They practiced this over and over, switching roles so everyone got to be the "sheriff."

It was totally silly, but the idea was to get you thinking about your training approach from a new perspective. I have no other goal than this here.

My apologies to any who don't find it funny.

~TT

 

[redfang]

Originally posted by Seig
Well twinkletoes,
It seems that even though I have a well known sense of humor, I find none in your post. I find it positvely insulting.
Congratulations.

Lighten up

 

[rmcrobertson]

I realize that this won't do any good. But let me ask: how would you react if I write a post on baseball, and I start like this:

"Good morning, kids. Today we're going to learn baseball. Now some people think baseball is all about having a goot time playing, learning skills, learning the rules, learning to apply their skills and the rules. We don't. We're just gonna have you go out their and run around, because the game of baseball is all tired out and it isn't a realistic game any more."

But what do we do?


"Well, after 45 minutes of practicing catching, we're all gonna go over an learn to play jai-lai." Then we'll have lunch, do 45 minutes of throwing, and its off to learn football..."

My dad's Joe DiMaggio. That's not how HE learned! First off, your dad's instructors didn't know what they were doing. I do....

Gettin' the picture? In the first place, attacks are assuredly a part of humor. But don't be surprised if a heavyhanded, "joke," offends exactly the people it was meant to offend...

And just incidentally, I don't happen to think that the "joke," I just wrote reflects truth. At all.

An owl, a priest and a nun walk into a bar...that's comedy.
Sincerely,
Buddy Hackett

 

[twinkletoes]

Originally posted by rmcrobertson
My dad's Joe DiMaggio. That's not how HE learned! First off, your dad's instructors didn't know what they were doing. I do....

That line right there is without a doubt the funniest thing I have read all morning.

Twinkletoes 0, rmcrobertson 1.

I acknowledge defeat! I am done with joke attempts. :asian:

~TT

 

[KenpoGirl]

Me thinks a couple people had LOOONNG long weekends, they seem a might grumpy and touchy. :wah:

I didn't take any offence if anything I just shrugged my shoulders and forgot about it.

Dot