Aiki Lee
Master of Arts
You do not need to become a poor person in China to do this. Meditate, go to church, be with your family, sleep on the ground in your own country. Do what you want to be spiritual but the "essence of life" as you put it can only be discovered from within. You are having an exestential deilema. Going to a new place will not solve it. Only prayer, meditation, and counseling will.
Why not start your own garden? Grow your own food, it could be theraputic.
You said you are not american, so I don't know what you culture is, but the modern world is no greater or worse in an objective sense than the ancient world. Circumstances are different and you may feel that the values you have are not reflected in society, but that is not necessarily the case. It is more likely that you simply do not see your values in society.
The fact that you wouldn't recomend this life style to others suggests that at least part of you knows how bad of an idea it really is.
Seeing as how I always screw up the quote feature when trying to quote multiple posts I will just copy and paste what Fenglong wrote and shade it in purple.
Well I got some experience with different kinds of life in China, I know how to find my way around and I know how to get some cash/food/bed.
How do you know these methods of providing yourself are still available or will be permanently available to you?
Why do some people feel the need to do certain things that seem unnecessarily dangerous?
It's common in young people as they often seek adventure. In older people it is usually the result of an unfullfilled life or they could be manic, depressed, or delusional.
I believe because it is part of a certain life style and perception of reality. I guess certain people put goals and life style above safety, and so do I.
A certain lifestyle that is dangerous and has a different perception of reality? That to me is exactly what my clients with bipolar, schizophrenia, or are addicted to drugs say. I'm not saying you have any of those conditions, but your mindset seems similar to that.
I'm all for living for something meaningful. Life is precious, only put it at risk when absolutely necessary and for a greater cause.
I do hope you understand that I only answer all these questions on a forum to understand myself better as well, not to satisfy anyone else.
Go to a counselor, that is what they are for. Seeing a counselor does not mean you are crazy or that you are "broken" or any other of the sterotypes people put on being in the mental health field. They will help you understand yourself better than an internet forum.
Maybe I have simply been through things in life that opened my eyes for the really important things in life, or maybe I just am suicidal, who knows.
What are the important things in life to you? For me it is the 3 fs: faith, family, friends. Do you not have these things, or do they simply not matter to you?
Your idea is incredibly dangerous and unrealistic. I am not trying to be mean or discourage you from your dreams. If you want to go to China, then go, but make it a vacation and not your whole life!
