How does one keep the outside world out of their training?

[Ironbear24]

I been having a hard time lately because real world issues I been dealing with can't escape my thoughts. This makes training very difficult and it's hard for me to give all of my focus into it when I got things nagging at my mind constantly.

I took a week off because of this and it's nice to have a break from training under them, and practicing more on my own, but I do want to get back in there with a clear head. I see people nearly transition from a total wreck to happy and determined as soon as they step in the door and I really want to know how that is possible. I would love to able to do that.

 

[jobo]

I been having a hard time lately because real world issues I been dealing with can't escape my thoughts. This makes training very difficult and it's hard for me to give all of my focus into it when I got things nagging at my mind constantly.

I took a week off because of this and it's nice to have a break from training under them, and practicing more on my own, but I do want to get back in there with a clear head. I see people nearly transition from a total wreck to happy and determined as soon as they step in the door and I really want to know how that is possible. I would love to able to do that.

fake it until you make it.
it depend of course on the nature of your problems, some problems are big and not easily put aside, some you only think are big, until an actual really big problem comes along to put them in perspective, but concentration on ma to distract yourself is a way to turn the worry off, give you some rest and reflection space,

 

[drop bear]

Moods again.

Focus on the now, pretty much. Martial arts is as much a psychological journey as it is a physical one. So you go in and train your mind to either switch off the external worries or work through them.

It is the hard grind of achieving all this mushin or enlightenment that nobody ever tells you.

 

[MA_Student]

If you can't focus properly even when distracted and something taking your mind off things it's probably best to take some time off and sort out your stuff out. If it's anxiety you can talk to a doctor who can give you advice

 

[Martial D]

I been having a hard time lately because real world issues I been dealing with can't escape my thoughts. This makes training very difficult and it's hard for me to give all of my focus into it when I got things nagging at my mind constantly.

I took a week off because of this and it's nice to have a break from training under them, and practicing more on my own, but I do want to get back in there with a clear head. I see people nearly transition from a total wreck to happy and determined as soon as they step in the door and I really want to know how that is possible. I would love to able to do that.

I can only speak for myself when i say when i am training, especially sparring, everything else just goes away.

I think that's half the reason I do it.

 

[Bill Mattocks]

I can only speak for myself when i say when i am training, especially sparring, everything else just goes away.

I think that's half the reason I do it.

Agreed. Me too.

 

[JR 137]

I can only speak for myself when i say when i am training, especially sparring, everything else just goes away.

I think that's half the reason I do it.

Me too. It's hard to think about my wife's nagging when someone's about to kick me in the head. It's hard to think about my kids' being a pain in the butt when I'm about to be punched in the stomach. It's hard to think about my boss's nonsense when I'm working through a kata.

It's like therapy. No other form of exercise nor anything else ever did that for me.

@Ironbear24 I don't know the extent of your problems, nor am I asking. But if these problems aren't going away no matter what you do, you may want to talk to a mental health professional/physician. Just throwing that out there.

 

[JowGaWolf]

been having a hard time lately because real world issues I been dealing with can't escape my thoughts.

Sometimes life gets in the way. 1st determine how big your problem is, if it's not that big then you can take an hour of practice to clear your mind and not think of it. Literally just drop the problem for an hour and pick it back up after class. If the problem is a big problem then address the problem first, because it won't leave your mind until you do. Keep in mind. The problem has to be a big problem and not "big to you" in other words, if I had your problem then I would say "I have a big problem" Sometimes we make problems bigger than what they really are. I look back on my 20's and I want to slap myself for thinking that some problems were big when they really weren't.

If the problem is something that can actually be solved then go ahead and get rid of it for good. If the problem involves how another person is acting then go train and just drop it out of your mind for an hour.

 

[Ironbear24]

I can only speak for myself when i say when i am training, especially sparring, everything else just goes away.

I think that's half the reason I do it.

For whatever reason it isn't. It's like my mind just isn't there. Worst thing that happens is I get hit and get a bruise but at the end of the day the threats not real enough to snap me into it. Sifu even gave me a good beating and that helped set things in perspective, but I would like to have that on and off switch ability to do it for myself, without having to get beaten up by the instructor because he is tired of me being too nice and having my head someplace else.

Today went well, I think it went well because I tried putting myself away from everything. Imagining I'm some spec ops or something being trained by the best provided by the government. Dorky I know but it worked for today. Also helped with the being too nice problem too, being like the waves ocean not caring what is in the way or something like that.

If I can keep it up that would be great, thanks for all the advice.

 

[oftheherd1]

Hard to give advice, not because I don't know the problem, but because I don't know you except for your posts here on MT. But in general, we just have to work through these things. In general, we should continue our training as we work on resolving the problem. Quitting one thing to help with another sometimes really does help, but all too often, it allows us an excuse to move away from the activity we leave. Is there any chance deep down that is a problem? Not wanting MA or not wanting the MA you are studying?

I do doubt the last two sentences above, since you seem to have a lot of enthusiasm. In that case, just try to work through your outside problem as quickly and smoothly as possible. And try not to give up MA if life allows it. It can actually become a sanctuary.

 

[drop bear]

For whatever reason it isn't. It's like my mind just isn't there. Worst thing that happens is I get hit and get a bruise but at the end of the day the threats not real enough to snap me into it. Sifu even gave me a good beating and that helped set things in perspective, but I would like to have that on and off switch ability to do it for myself, without having to get beaten up by the instructor because he is tired of me being too nice and having my head someplace else.

Today went well, I think it went well because I tried putting myself away from everything. Imagining I'm some spec ops or something being trained by the best provided by the government. Dorky I know but it worked for today. Also helped with the being too nice problem too, being like the waves ocean not caring what is in the way or something like that.

If I can keep it up that would be great, thanks for all the advice.

Buy yourself a pink t shirt with pussy written on it. When you train in a manner that is that is basically being a pussy. You have to wear the T Shirt.

Or even this T Shirt.

 

[Martial_Kumite]

One thing that really stuck in my memory is something that my instructor said to me about bowing befor we enter the dojang. " When you bow, you are emptying your self of the day, so that you can be filled with what your are about to learn in here [dojang]."
When I have something hard going on in my life, the studio is always a place for me to excape. I just focuse on that hour, that moment, of my life just to not worry about what goses on outside of those walls. It is hard, and takes some practice, but after my training I am always able to view the problem I left at the door with a little bit clearer mind.

Hope that helps, and good luck with what ever you are dealing with.

 

[MI_martialist]

For me, it is about the purpose of training and the intensity of training. Think of the dojo, not as a dojo, where ceremonies are done, but rather an enbujo...where a martial performance is done...and go one step furthers, if martial training is about martial, it really is a senjou...a battleground...live in the battleground. When you are training, focus on the battle...mokuso and mokuteki hon ii...those are the things...how can you think of anything else when you approach your training as life and death.

 

[FighterTwister]

I been having a hard time lately because real world issues I been dealing with can't escape my thoughts. This makes training very difficult and it's hard for me to give all of my focus into it when I got things nagging at my mind constantly.

I took a week off because of this and it's nice to have a break from training under them, and practicing more on my own, but I do want to get back in there with a clear head. I see people nearly transition from a total wreck to happy and determined as soon as they step in the door and I really want to know how that is possible. I would love to able to do that.

I hear you M8,

If I may offer any support or help in my opinion it would be to confront this with people that have a professional background in counseling or trained on counseling techniques.

Personal training, studies and support methods that have helped me to deal with my personal garbage and many others are "Behavioral Thought Process Techniques" - By Professional counseling instructors and courses that one can do easily.

That have equipped me on Family issues, Anger Management, Forgiving, Thought Processes, Accountability and Responsibility in understanding self or being self aware and in control of behaviors and thoughts so on.

Great skills to have in today's work forces as well and also with friends and family etc, especially creating "Boundaries", it has taken the weight off my shoulders so to speak having this in my interpersonal skills has been a great benefit.

You will find such peace within yourself it will also boost confidence in dealing with people as well, you wont change people but you can decide how you control your own emotions and actions allot better, it won't be perfect but you will improve as you practice these methods and tools.

Its not about perfection but understanding the complex world we live in.

Some great martial art centers have people trained on these skills to assist people with anger or forgiveness in their past upbringing background.

Or you might need to visit a private specialist in this field to get things off your chest and find that inner peace that will make life easier and also build good friendships.

Where people find resolve and confront the issues they have not excusing the wrong in others but forgiving them as people, frees yourself.

Some areas to look into are:-

• Emotional Intelligence Link:- Emotional intelligence - Wikipedia
  
• Conflict and Resolution Link:- Conflict resolution - Wikipedia
  
• Thought Processes Link:- thought processes psychology - Google Search
  
• Developing Personal Boundaries Link:- Personal boundaries - Wikipedia
  
• Choices and Decisions Link:- Choice vs. Decision
  
• Relationship Techniques " Like Drop the Rope" or "The Elephant in the Room" Link:- Interpersonal relationship - Wikipedia
  
• Learning about Dysfunctional Families and People around you Link:- Dysfunctional family - Wikipedia
  
• Behavioral "Cause and Effects" Link:- Behavior - Wikipedia
  
• Communication Links:- Communication - Wikipedia
• Types of Personalities Link:- Personality type - Wikipedia

Note:- Also spend time Googling these subjects online for Webpages, Articles, YouTubes, Online video Lectures and PDF's to Download and study there are heaps of resources to draw from these days on the internet.

Also I have to give credit to my lovely wife who I have been married now to for over 20 years, she has taken the brunt of all my frustrations and anger or life issues she understands me very well. I have learned to be more open and honest in confronting myself and dealing with what I can control that is my own actions and not others and developing better boundaries and coping skills.

I have done this by listening and then discussing and taking responsibility for my own actions and thoughts.

How the Human Brain works and How you think......................

You might want to check out "Imago Relationship Exercise" here is Link:- http://www.cape.org/2010/material/hendrix/FACT_A-Manual.pdf

When you next visit your training center just focus on what needs to be done and respect the surrounding and keep in mind the above should keep you in a better state of mind and/or attitude, to enjoy the session and have fun!

I have so much stuff on my hard drive to share but I hope that is enough for a Forum post to help others.

So I hope that helps anyone willing to learn about themselves in real life circumstances and improve on a better life and build great friendships.

Cheers

 

[MI_martialist]

Or, just train!

 

[Gerry Seymour]

I been having a hard time lately because real world issues I been dealing with can't escape my thoughts. This makes training very difficult and it's hard for me to give all of my focus into it when I got things nagging at my mind constantly.

I took a week off because of this and it's nice to have a break from training under them, and practicing more on my own, but I do want to get back in there with a clear head. I see people nearly transition from a total wreck to happy and determined as soon as they step in the door and I really want to know how that is possible. I would love to able to do that.

This is a mindfulness question. Essentially, you're asking how to keep your mind on the present moment - something many people struggle with, both within and outside MA. Part of the answer is to go deeper. Don't try to exclude the outside thoughts (there's some strong evidence that the harder we try not to think of something, the more we think of it). If they intrude, make a mental note of it (non-judgmental - just so you are noticing it, which is a form of being mindful), then turn your thoughts back to the task at hand. The more you focus on the task, the less room there is for other thoughts.

And cut yourself some slack when it doesn't work, because that will happen. Nothing is 100%.

I can remember dealing with this same issue when a business of mine was failing, and money was negatively available for a while. I managed to keep up my training payments for a period, because that was part of my stress management, but I don't think I managed to go through a single class during that time without some stressed thought about money creeping in. It was less fun, but still worthwhile. I just had to rebuild the practice/habit of spending my mental focus on the class, so there wasn't so much room for those thoughts.

 

[Ironbear24]

Buy yourself a pink t shirt with pussy written on it. When you train in a manner that is that is basically being a pussy. You have to wear the T Shirt.

Or even this T Shirt.

I'm A Pussy T-Shirt

Found one

 

[marques]

What else 'cleans' your mind as much as martial arts training (and especially sparring)? I would like to find a replacement to it, since good* sparring is hard to find/arrange. Thanks.
*for my taste, but also in general since many clubs simply don't spar.

 

[Buka]

Keep the outside world out - close the door, bro. Metaphorically, mentally, spirit wise. Lock that puppy and shove the key down your cup.

 

[Gerry Seymour]

What else 'cleans' your mind as much as martial arts training (and especially sparring)? I would like to find a replacement to it, since good* sparring is hard to find/arrange. Thanks.
*for my taste, but also in general since many clubs simply don't spar.

For me, hiking. I hike fairly intensely - I like hills and moving at a fast walk.