By the way....

Discussion in 'Tae-Kwon-Do' started by Rabbitthekitten, Apr 2, 2017.

  1. Rabbitthekitten

    Rabbitthekitten Green Belt

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    I got my yellow belt last week. I absolutely hated grading for it. It only gets harder. How do I stop hating it?
     
  2. CB Jones

    CB Jones Master of Arts

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    Congrats
     
  3. Transk53

    Transk53 The Dark Often Prevails

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    Nice and well done. Don't hate it, just embrace it.
     
  4. TrueJim

    TrueJim 3rd Black Belt

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    You like the practicing, but you hate the grading? Is that it?
     
  5. Rabbitthekitten

    Rabbitthekitten Green Belt

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    Pretty much. My mind goes blank. I forget the basics. I feel like a fraud. My instructor takes me to one side to "clarify" a few points. Basically stuff I got wrong. After correcting me gives me the grade. I just hate it.
     
  6. ks - learning to fly

    ks - learning to fly Senior Master

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    My Instructor once told me that some people are good in practice,
    but bad in testing and some people are the opposite..not that it
    wasn't something that could be worked on though..

    Something that helps me is something I tell people I work
    with on basics and fundamentals and that is 'practice like
    you're testing'. Your biggest obstacle in martial arts - and
    in life - is yourself.. your own self doubt and one of the
    reasons I love TKD is because it has helped me gain the
    courage to accomplish what I once thought impossible. If you
    practice like you're testing, you'll push yourself more to
    focus on the little things and when you're working on the
    basics you'll begin to notice points of improvement.. This
    way - when the next grading rolls around - it might help
    reduce the 'blanking out' and you'll be able to perform
    with a higher level of confidence.

    Only my opinion, but I hope it helps! :)
     
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  7. Dirty Dog

    Dirty Dog MT Senior Moderator Staff Member

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    Some people just freak out about tests. My wife does. Even though we don't actually have tests.
     
  8. Touch Of Death

    Touch Of Death Sr. Grandmaster

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    Stress is part of the test. :D
     
  9. Tames D

    Tames D RECKLESS

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    Congrats. The best rewards in life require hating the process.
     
  10. Balrog

    Balrog Master of Arts

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    Confidence. The more (and sooner) you realize that you will be successful, the less strenuous the testings become.
     
  11. Rabbitthekitten

    Rabbitthekitten Green Belt

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    My confidence seems to have deserted me at the moment. I've just got a new belt and I feel terrible about it.

    I think there is something wrong with me.
     
  12. gpseymour

    gpseymour Sr. Grandmaster

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    Don't sweat it too much. Some people dislike testing. I was never one of them (neither in school, nor in MA). The good news is that the longer you train, the longer the time between tests. I've always liked that. Unless I pick up a new art or join an association, I'm never going to need to test again.
     
  13. gpseymour

    gpseymour Sr. Grandmaster

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    Nothing wrong with you. It sounds like you're dealing with what is known as "the imposter syndrome". It's fairly common. I see it a lot in the business world, and it is most likely to occur right after someone is promoted.
     
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  14. Rabbitthekitten

    Rabbitthekitten Green Belt

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    I get it with exams too.

    Actually a few years ago I was elected as a Fellow of the Royal Astronomical Society and I felt exactly the same way about that. Like a guy in his 30's could never be the equivalent of all these brilliant minds.

    I just did a quick google search. I never heard of this before and it seems familiar. Thanks, I might do some research now. :)
     
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  15. gpseymour

    gpseymour Sr. Grandmaster

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    Most people experience it at times. It's something I run into on a regular basis, myself, though not as much in martial arts as in other areas.
     
  16. Touch Of Death

    Touch Of Death Sr. Grandmaster

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    Not feelin like you deserve the rank is normal. The problems start when you covet higher ranks. This is all part of the experience, and you are doing fine. o_O
     
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  17. Bill Mattocks

    Bill Mattocks Sr. Grandmaster

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    Consider part of the evaluation to be how well you accept constructive criticism - even criticism you don't think you deserve.

    Consider that you're not a fraud or you would not be there being graded. When you forget basics or get hung up half-way through an exercise, you are not doing anything that others have not also done. Your instructor knows full well your abilities, the 'test' is generally nothing of the sort.

    So grit your teeth, be humble, move on.

    By the way, if you hate that, wait until you turn 50 and have to get a colonoscopy. Talk about hating something you have to do anyway...

     
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2017
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  18. Flying Crane

    Flying Crane Sr. Grandmaster

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    Well hell. As someone who also has an interest in astronomy, that is pretty damn cool. Congratulations on that, by the way.

    And I will say that I am struggling with the math and I'm not even in calculus yet. When do I get to stop feeling like an imposter with the math?
     
  19. serietah

    serietah Green Belt

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    My mom gets so nervous before belt tests that she has to take the day of, and most of the times the day before, off work so she can mentally prepare. She takes anti-anxiety medicine before the test too. For our yellow belt test, she almost ran off the mat before it was our turn. It's bad. But it gets easier as you learn what is expected of you and how things will go. At my school, you don't get to test if you aren't ready, so mistakes in testing don't automatically mean you fail. I've seen kids given 3 or 4 chances to do their form right. A few months ago, I even had to take a couple kids outside for extra practice so they could go back in and do it right. The same kids tested last week and did an amazing job. Mental training is part of the training. Perseverance! Never give up.
     
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  20. gpseymour

    gpseymour Sr. Grandmaster

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    I'm so much the opposite. I'm just lucky - it's nothing I've developed, so I can claim no pride in it. For my BB self-defense test (the hardest single part of the testing, about an hour of responding to one attack after another), I did little prep. I figured I'd done all that in the years of getting to that point. I went to a regular class or two that day, I think, then did my test. I wasn't spectacular, but I passed easily. I think a lot of my test results are as much an indication of how relaxed I am at testing, as they are an indication of what they are meant to test. I wish I knew some way to lend that to others.
     

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