Misfit and outcast

[terryl965]

How many of us was either a misfit or outcast while we where in school because of our MA training and what did you do to control yourself and continue your training, how did you deal with the peer pressure of it all?

[MA-Caver]

When I started, eons ago... I kept it to myself until I had to use it. Basically I was the token whipping boy at my school(s). The nerd (now known as geeks) that was the easy pickings when the bullies were having a bad day from class (home) their teachers (and parents) and thus they needed to have someone take their mad out on.
Wasn't always successful, wasn't always effective but ... but most of the bullies left me alone soon after a while when I fought back. Mebbe it's the loss of easy prey or the possibility that I actually hurt them ... maybe not as badly as they hurt me but they must've walked away hurtin' because they mostly avoided me or better put... ignored me.
Went all through the rest of my life like that. Never talking openly about it, never getting crazy with it. Just kept it to myself until I had to use it. Of that I can be proud of myself for. Made me look less of a fool in front of my peers, not running off at the mouth and bragging I'm learning this (art) or that. Couple of my friends knew but only because they confided that they were training as well in whatever art they were learning at the time.
It's the way it should be.

not to mention it's fun seeing the looks on the (bullies and later attackers) faces when I "whip out my mojo on 'em!" :lol: Like... where the hell did that come from?

[Ceicei]

Because of being in martial art? Not for that reason. I was a misfit and outcast for other reasons (primarily because I'm deaf). I've learned how to live with it and get "get out of myself" to become friends with others. Being in martial arts, however, helped me to feel more confident with myself.

- Ceicei

[terryl965]

Because of being in martial art? Not for that reason. I was a misfit and outcast for other reasons (primarily because I'm deaf). I've learned how to live with it and get "get out of myself" to become friends with others. Being in martial arts, however, helped me to feel more confident with myself.

- Ceicei


Very well put

[terryl965]

When I started, eons ago... I kept it to myself until I had to use it. Basically I was the token whipping boy at my school(s). The nerd (now known as geeks) that was the easy pickings when the bullies were having a bad day from class (home) their teachers (and parents) and thus they needed to have someone take their mad out on.
Wasn't always successful, wasn't always effective but ... but most of the bullies left me alone soon after a while when I fought back. Mebbe it's the loss of easy prey or the possibility that I actually hurt them ... maybe not as badly as they hurt me but they must've walked away hurtin' because they mostly avoided me or better put... ignored me.
Went all through the rest of my life like that. Never talking openly about it, never getting crazy with it. Just kept it to myself until I had to use it. Of that I can be proud of myself for. Made me look less of a fool in front of my peers, not running off at the mouth and bragging I'm learning this (art) or that. Couple of my friends knew but only because they confided that they were training as well in whatever art they were learning at the time.
It's the way it should be.

not to mention it's fun seeing the looks on the (bullies and later attackers) faces when I "whip out my mojo on 'em!" :lol: Like... where the hell did that come from?


I love the last part.

[tellner]

*raises hand*

Causality ran the other way. I got into martial arts because I was a misfit, not the other way around.

[bushidomartialarts]

*raises hand*

Causality ran the other way. I got into martial arts because I was a misfit, not the other way around.

Ditto here. I've noticed a disproportionate number of geeks in the martial arts, probably for this reason.

[bluekey88]

MIsfit, outcast, nerd, geek, spaz....yes, all monikers I wore growing up. Probably why I eventually went into MA (tired of getting beat up and had a strong desire to be the pounder and not the poundee).

MA training never made me an outcast...if anything it gave me some framework on which to build some self-esteem. It's taken me 36 years, but now I wave my freak flag proudly. What made me a misfit in my youth has made me a contributing valuable member of society as an adult. Go figure.

Peace,
Erik

[Drac]

I was an outcast because of my weight..The MA didn't come until much later...

[Blindside]

I quit karate and hung out with the not-really-so-cool kids.

Lamont

[bookworm_cn317]

*raises hand*

Causality ran the other way. I got into martial arts because I was a misfit, not the other way around.

Much like tellner, I, too, got into the martial arts BECAUSE I was a misfit. I was mostly a loner--still am, actually.

[Steel Tiger]

Sorry guys, I was a student athlete and fitted in very well at school. MAs were an interest that I chose to explore and continue to do so.

[Drac]

Sorry guys, I was a student athlete and fitted in very well at school. MAs were an interest that I chose to explore and continue to do so.

A Jock..Quick hide the stash...LOL..

[Steel Tiger]

A Jock..Quick hide the stash...LOL..

I'm taken aback by such a suggestion. No athlete would pollute their bodies in such a fashion, surely.:uhyeah:

[searcher]

I was an athlete in school and I was treated like an outcast. I was beaten almost every day by the same group of guys. I had one friend and he had no other friends except me. I had been training since childhood and refused to use it for fear of my father beating me worse when I got home. I later broke out of my father's training and took up EPAK in the hopes of one day getting even with the beaters. After several different schools and styles I stopped looking for revenge.

So, not all "jocks" were treated good.

[kidswarrior]

I was an athlete in school and I was treated like an outcast. I was beaten almost every day by the same group of guys. I had one friend and he had no other friends except me.

So, not all "jocks" were treated good.Kinda my story till Junior High. Got a little size after that, took up wrestling and boxing (Asian arts were still exotic and hard to find locally in those days), and suddenly the tables were turned. But as searcher said, even then I didn't hunt them down....But I guess there's still time. :D

[megat]

hmmm i was already a loner before i took MA, if anything MA gave me more friends, heheheh nice benefit eh

[Kacey]

I started TKD in college; as others have said, I was an outcast in school for other reasons, primarily that we moved a lot; I went to 9 schools in 5 different states between kindergarten and high school graduation, so I was almost always "the new kid".

As with Ceicei, TKD gave me more confidence, and made me more comfortable with myself; I was not into sports growing up, and was always just a little uncoordinated and awkward, and because of the moving around, my hobbies tended to be solitary ones, so TKD also gave me a place to make friends and a source of social activities that I hadn't had before.

[qi-tah]

I was an athlete in school and I was treated like an outcast. I was beaten almost every day by the same group of guys. I had one friend and he had no other friends except me. I had been training since childhood and refused to use it for fear of my father beating me worse when I got home. I later broke out of my father's training and took up EPAK in the hopes of one day getting even with the beaters. After several different schools and styles I stopped looking for revenge.

So, not all "jocks" were treated good.

Yeah, especially not when they are girls and refuse to play netball.(or the equivilent "female" specific sports that are played in parts of the world outside of Aust.) Bloody stupid game, is there any other "sport" in the known universe where you are prohibited from running once you get the ball??

At school i was a geek jock arty weirdo that played RPG's and sang in the choir, so it's fair to say that i attracted my fair share of attention from the school thugs. Especially once i came out.

I wish i wish i wish i had been able to do martial arts when i was in school... i did weightlifting instead and was the only chick in the class. Once the fellas saw i was serious, they let me join in their arm wrestles etc, but other than that superficial bonding it was a very lonely time.

[K' Evans]

Quite interesting that there is a "cultural phenomeon" of sorts, that misfits and "loners" tend to turn to MAs as a means to express themselves.

I was, and still am, pretty much considered a misfit, outcast and straight out "weirdo" during my younger days. I didn't learn martial arts formally during that time, but I don't doubt that those experiences have an impact on me and are partly influential in my decision to take up MAs.

Recently, I bumped into an old classmate in a MA gathering event, and I was shocked to see her there. She was very much like me, an outcast in school, and she was really the nerdy and bookworm kind of girl. Despite her short and nerdish stature, she is now taking up MMA and Karate and I was impressed by her performance. She's definitely not the nerdy bookwormish outcast I used to know.

I think for those of us who belong in this category, there is definitely something empowering abt taking up MA that improves ourself-esteem. I know for myself, personally I could reach into my memory, and dig up those alienating experiences, and use them to motivate and push me in my training. While I don't hold a grudge towards those peers who gave me an unhappy childhood (we were all immature kids at some point in our lives), I don't deny that there is still a strong sense in me to prove that I am not the same "loser" they made me out to be.

But now I am not interested to prove to others. Only myself.

[MBuzzy]

I'm also in the geek crowd. I got beat up every day! I joined Martial Arts mostly to have something to do after school and to build my self confidence. It helped me lose a lot of weight in my younger days.

Though when I got to high school, I got heavily involved in Music and that gave me a place to belong. And unfortunately took up all of my spare time, so my training got put on hold for a few years.

[Hawke]

I chose to move around different groups. I usually felt comfortable with the nerds. To this day I enjoy roleplaying games.

I have been training in MA since I was a kid. I rarely met anyone in school that trained in any MA (this was good for me...hehe). The few fights I have been in at school was due to my skin color or height.

Peace.

[Carol]

Different groups here too but I always tend to be one geek or the other...either technology geek or the gamer geek...or then this one time, at band camp............... :lol2:

[Hawke]

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

[Hand Sword]

How many of us was either a misfit or outcast while we where in school because of our MA training and what did you do to control yourself and continue your training, how did you deal with the peer pressure of it all?

Going by the view of the Popular group, though I knew quite a few, I would say I was definitely an outcast. At lunch, I'd sit all alone at my very own table. I've always been a loner and have always done what I wanted to. So, though my M.A. training caused laughs, it never bothered me honestly. I just did my own thing as I always have.

[Shotochem]

I regret not being exposed to MA when I was in School.

I was your typical music and science geek. I wrestled in school but I preferred to work after school instead. $$$$$$$

Let me see....roll around with a bunch of sweaty immature guys ...or.....
make money to take the girls out on weekends??????? :ultracool

I was small and an easy target. I grew 4 inches after graduation and within 2 yrs put on 30lbs of muscle. I used to think it just wasn't fair.

20yrs later @ my HS reunion, all the jocks, prom queen and "cool" people
look like hell. I look and feel 10 yrs younger thanks to my MA training which I started @ 30yrs old.

PRICELESS!!!!!!!!%-}

[kidswarrior]

20yrs later @ my HS reunion, all the jocks, prom queen and "cool" people
look like hell. I look and feel 10 yrs younger thanks to my MA training which I started @ 30yrs old.

PRICELESS!!!!!!!!%-}
I feel ya. Let's hear it for the late bloomers. :-partyon:
Never been to a high school reunion, for the very reason I don't want to see all those 'cool' people. But I'll be 56 in a few weeks, and can still plow circles around the 16-yr-olds I teach, whether in the classroom or the training hall. And that's from MA (I started at 42--I think). So let's see, 56 minus 16=...*takes off shoes and uses toes to count*...I was 40 when they were born. Ain't Martial Arts grand? :highfive:

[kidswarrior]

Different groups here too but I always tend to be one geek or the other...either technology geek or the gamer geek...or then this one time, at band camp............... :lol2:

Com'awn, Carol, don't hold out. I want to hear about band camp. ;)

[MBuzzy]

Let me see....roll around with a bunch of sweaty immature guys ...or.....
make money to take the girls out on weekends??????? :ultracool


GIRLS SPOKE TO YOU?!?!? LUCKY!!!

[Shotochem]

GIRLS SPOKE TO YOU?!?!? LUCKY!!!

I liked my nerdy band camp girlfriends!!!! :wink1:

-Marc-

[Martial Tucker]

Ditto here. I've noticed a disproportionate number of geeks in the martial arts, probably for this reason.

I strongly resemble that remark....I was called a "closet nerd" in high school and college, because, at least in high school, I was the biggest, strongest kid in school. I was also a star 3 sport athlete. But when my sports teammates wanted to go drink beer and get laid, I preferred to go home and set up my telescope in my backyard and check out the skies, or just stay up all night reading a good science or philosophy book. Went on to play football for a major college, but still never fit in, for the above-mentioned reasons. Just couldn't identify with the typical "jock" mentality. At the same time, the other "nerds" didn't fully accept me because of my athletic reputation.
Spent a couple of years in college as a bouncer in a pretty rowdy place. I was able to take care of myself and keep control because of my size and strength. Got into martial arts because the brawling fighting style I had as a bouncer seemed so awkward, and I knew as I aged, I would need actual skill rather than force to protect myself, if necessary. Haven't been in a fight in 24 years, but still one of my best decisions ever.

[Martial Tucker]

20yrs later @ my HS reunion, all the jocks, prom queen and "cool" people
look like hell. I look and feel 10 yrs younger thanks to my MA training which I started @ 30yrs old.

PRICELESS!!!!!!!!%-}

I had the identical experience! I was kind to all I encountered, but I laughed all the way home. Kids who wouldn't even talk to me in high school, looking like hell and leading miserable lives...meekly telling me how great I looked... I remind my own kids about this experience often when they seem to feel like they need to impress a peer for some reason.

[fireman00]

Like some of you I wish I had found MA during high school rather then 15 years afterwards... but rather late then never I guess.

I was a loner in high school - and still am except for my friends in the dojang and the guys on the fire dept.

MA have helped me in gaining a great deal of self confidence and I've more adept at dealing with people.

[jks9199]

In high school -- not a geek, not a nerd, not a jock (though I was on school teams for 3 out of the 4 years, and even got a school letter), just "there." A little (OK... probably more than a little) odd and "unique." I think that's the word that showed up a lot in my yearbook...

I had friends in some of the "cool" groups -- and in the "outcast/misfit" groups, too. A little too straitlaced for a lot of folks. (Still am.) Had a core of friends that were mostly a little offbeat, too...

But, I was definitely a loner. Lots of reasons, none of which led me to martial arts.

Started formal martial arts my senior year; continued training to this day.

Oh... and I've got a very dry & subtle sense of humor. Really -- I do joke. It's just that lots of people don't notice...

[Carol]

Oh... and I've got a very dry & subtle sense of humor. Really -- I do joke. It's just that lots of people don't notice...


Try putting away the gun and the nightstick first, JKS. (Just kidding...) :lol:

[LawDog]

A follower of trends I was / am not. Followed my own path I did / do. This helped in getting my a** kicked many times during my early H.S. years. Never more.

[bydand]

Wow, it appears I go against the grain here. Never really a nerd, geek, or a jock, or even a bit unique all through school. I trained in Judo, for a short time at one school, but as-per-usual we moved away and I didn't continue when we got to the new location. I can relate to Kacey and always being the "new kid" pop on top of that for my High School years not only was I the New Kid, but also a "PK" (Preachers Kid). 9th and 10th grade to add insult to injury I was "That GD Yankee" in a small hick town outside of Dallas. Not a competitive bone in my body during school years so no sports, but with all the moving I did develop a strikingly good Left jab followed by a Right Cross (Pun intended) that generally put the "testing of the New Guy" to bed within a week or so of going to a new school. Once that first fight was over with and you got to go back to school after a "vacation" I tended to slide into the background and just put in my time. The passion for the arts came several years later, and they have brought out my more pleasant, sociable side. I owe a LOT to the arts and just wish I could have trained while in school because I think I would have enjoyed being there more than I did. Somewhat of a misfit, but that would depend on who you talked to. I fit in with everybody, just didn't hang out with any one crowd in particular.

[Darth F.Takeda]

Having a crossed eye, glasses, a high IQ, biker parents and living in a small town made me an outcast when I was a child and I got in a lot of fights because I had to much spirit to stand for being messed with by a bunch of yocals, who were destined to never leave that small town.

As a young teen I was an outcast because I was white in a school that was 75% minority, then as an older teen, having long hair and listening to hardcore metal and punk did not rub well with many of the above mentioned and the jocks.

Martial arts and practicle application, provided by bullies and jerks, as well as the criminals in my hood made me a decent fighter and why my focus is always on real fighting before any higher MA ideals or sport fighting, that said, the arts gave me more confedence and control as I got older.

By 18 I was pretty popular, as I was a guitarist, could scrap and had a large groupd of freinds (Metal heads became cool in the age of grunge, girls who would not talk to me in HS, now wanted to.....)

Hell I am still an outcast sometimes, I just got a mohawk at 34 years of age.

[jks9199]

Try putting away the gun and the nightstick first, JKS. (Just kidding...) :lol:
The beatings will continue until the laughter begins!
LOL

[Drac]

Still considered and outcast because at my age I would rather learn or teach some hand-to-hand stuff than take it easy...

[MA-Caver]

Wow, it appears I go against the grain here. Never really a nerd, geek, or a jock, or even a bit unique all through school. I trained in Judo, for a short time at one school, but as-per-usual we moved away and I didn't continue when we got to the new location. I can relate to Kacey and always being the "new kid" pop on top of that for my High School years not only was I the New Kid, but also a "PK" (Preachers Kid). 9th and 10th grade to add insult to injury I was "That GD Yankee" in a small hick town outside of Dallas. Not a competitive bone in my body during school years so no sports, but with all the moving I did develop a strikingly good Left jab followed by a Right Cross (Pun intended) that generally put the "testing of the New Guy" to bed within a week or so of going to a new school. Once that first fight was over with and you got to go back to school after a "vacation" I tended to slide into the background and just put in my time. The passion for the arts came several years later, and they have brought out my more pleasant, sociable side. I owe a LOT to the arts and just wish I could have trained while in school because I think I would have enjoyed being there more than I did. Somewhat of a misfit, but that would depend on who you talked to. I fit in with everybody, just didn't hang out with any one crowd in particular.

One of those rare individuals... :uhyeah:

[Tong Po]

When I was a sophomore in HS I had a friend who for some unknown reason went around telling people how tough a fighter I was. Well as the HS grapevine grows it continued to grow to epic proportions. Christmas came along and my parents bought me a karate school jacket so that kinda cemented the deal. LOL I just kept being myself and kinda ignored it.

It came in handy once when it got out that I liked this girl who was a Senior. Well unbeknown to me she had this rough and tumble boyfriend that now wanted to kill me......that is until he found out I was that "Sophomore Super Ninja" everyone was raving about! :mst:

[kidswarrior]

Still considered and outcast because at my age I would rather learn or teach some hand-to-hand stuff than take it easy...
Some of us just refuse to grow up. :D I think it's overrated anyway. As Mother Teresa said, I'll rest when I'm dead. :ultracool