Has this happened to you

[kicksindabank]

Has this happened to you:

You are at a tournament, in class, or wherever. You see someone who catches your eye. So, get a chance to get to actually have a conversation with them. You begin to find yourself somewhat physically attracted to that person. Until you realized this person you are physically attracted to is a Senesi!!!:xtrmshock :erg: (he is not in my school, but he is at a lot of the tournaments I go to!)

Part of me knows this is wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. I mean he is a Senesi!!! Yet, part of me is like take a chance!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh!!!! What would you do?

[matt.m]

You know it does not matter if he is a teacher or not. The main point he is not in your school. So no big deal. Yeah, the same has happened to me before.

[Kembudo-Kai Kempoka]

I guess I'm missing something. So what if he's a sensei? Everybody does SOMETHING for a hobby or living. If you like the guy, go for it. If not, don't. At least he's not a [fill in the blank].

Regards,

Dave

[Ceicei]

Well, if he is from a different school, then I ordinarily don't see much of a problem regardless of rank. If he is within your age range, both of you enjoy talking together, and have mutual interest, why not?

So he has a black belt. Ok. He deserves respect, sure. Bottom line, he is still a person worthy of becoming friends, with or without the rank. The black belt just represents his knowledge and hard work.

Do not put too much concern on the color of the belt unless the situation requires this (such as at dojos, when on official duty at tournaments, etc.)

- Ceicei

[Carol]

Yeah, it's happened to me but the end result has been the fellow either having issues he's working through and not wanting to date...or being married and not understanding why I don't want to go out with him anyway. Must be my perfume. :idunno:

Can't hurt to get to know the fellow a bit better. He may, or may not, be a match...just like any other gentleman. Prolly worth the chance to find out :)

[Flying Crane]

I guess I'm missing something. So what if he's a sensei? Everybody does SOMETHING for a hobby or living. If you like the guy, go for it. If not, don't. At least he's not a [fill in the blank].

Regards,

Dave

I gotta agree with this. So he's a sensei. He's not your sensei. So what? get to know him...

[Christina05]

I gotta agree with this. So he's a sensei. He's not your sensei. So what? get to know him...

Im gonna agree get to know him and then make your decesion wheather or not you want to take it to that kind of level. At least you already know you have some thing to talk about.

[Drac]

At least you already know you have some thing to talk about.

Finding someone who loves something that is a major part of your life is a rare and wounderous occurence..

[Blindside]

The upside is that you go into the relationship knowing that you will always be in second place behind his martial art.

Wait, you know that right????

I'm only sort of kidding.

Lamont

[kicksindabank]

thanks guys for the comments. i am going to get to know him and see. I will keep you posted. :)

[Drac]

Hope it's all good....

[kicksindabank]

think about my batting record in the game of love (let's just say a pitcher has a better chance of getting the Cy Yound Award). I am going to stay friends.

Thanks for all of the comments. You guys rock!

[lenatoi]

What would I do?.................. I think you should ask my husband.:wink2:

[kimballmaster]

Why not ask your sensie about it??

[Blindside]

think about my batting record in the game of love (let's just say a pitcher has a better chance of getting the Cy Yound Award). I am going to stay friends.

Thanks for all of the comments. You guys rock!

Hold on, you can't back out because of your "batting record." You'll never get anywhere that way, she who dares, wins.

[Shaolinwind]

think about my batting record in the game of love (let's just say a pitcher has a better chance of getting the Cy Yound Award). I am going to stay friends.

Thanks for all of the comments. You guys rock!

I'd be far too intimidated to attempt to date a martial arts instructor. Now if she asked me, different story.

It makes sense, at least to me that one would be intimidated. We see our instructors as mentors, sometimes view them as parents, sometimes as superhuman. Naturally that feeling might carry over to any instructor. I'd be far too intimidated to attempt to date a martial arts instructor. Now if she asked me, different story.

Just remember Sensei's & Sifu's & Kyo Sa's need lovin' too! (And I apologize for putting that mental picture in anyone's head.)

[kicksindabank]

It has been a while since this post, so I am going to bring you up to speed.

I have decided to just be friends with the person. Call it an sixth sense, but I know it wouldn't work. He knows what he wants in female, and trust me I don't meet the qualifications.

I have learned in all this, being friends with someone of the opposite gender is fine. There is nothing wrong with it at all.:)


Well, this way I can focus more on my training.

[bushidomartialarts]

speaking for senseis worldwide, if you want to date him you should give it a try.


also you should buy him ice cream.

[ArmorOfGod]

No, but one time I walked up and started talking to my sensei's (then) girlfriend. I had no idea they were dating, as it was in the first week or two at that school.
When I found out, I had a good laugh at myself.
Oh well, no harm, no foul. Needless to say, I did not consider trying to move in on his territory after I found out who was who.

AoG

[Tez3]

....... He knows what he wants in female, and trust me I don't meet the qualifications.

I know that one! And it hurts, don't forget though that's only his opinion not a criticism of you!

[chris_มวยไทย]

I know that one! And it hurts, don't forget though that's only his opinion not a criticism of you!

yep , and remember that! you will find "the one" one day , it takes patience , which im sure most martial artists have (it takes time to gain ranks)

good luck

chris

[zDom]

It has been a while since this post, so I am going to bring you up to speed.

I have decided to just be friends with the person. Call it an sixth sense, but I know it wouldn't work. He knows what he wants in female, and trust me I don't meet the qualifications.

I have learned in all this, being friends with someone of the opposite gender is fine. There is nothing wrong with it at all.:)


Well, this way I can focus more on my training.

Probably for the best. You would be MUCH happier with a Korean martial art stylist =D

Just kidding ;)

But seriously, just because this didn't work out, don't rule out other martial artists (regardless of rank) in the future — like Drac said, finding someone with similar interests can be great.

[Brian R. VanCise]

He is a human first before he is a teacher. If you are interested you should see if he is interested. Good luck.

[Drac]

He is a human first before he is a teacher. If you are interested you should see if he is interested. Good luck.

Yep...

[kicksindabank]

I am so loving the comments! They are funny. I thank you for them (I will remember the ice cream).

I think for now, I need to really buckle down on staying true and strong to this martial arts journey.

[Drac]

A good friend can help you with trials and tribulations of your journey..Man nor woman cannot live on MA alone...Keep us posted..

[Touch Of Death]

Has this happened to you:

You are at a tournament, in class, or wherever. You see someone who catches your eye. So, get a chance to get to actually have a conversation with them. You begin to find yourself somewhat physically attracted to that person. Until you realized this person you are physically attracted to is a Senesi!!!:xtrmshock :erg: (he is not in my school, but he is at a lot of the tournaments I go to!)

Part of me knows this is wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. I mean he is a Senesi!!! Yet, part of me is like take a chance!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh!!!! What would you do?I'm missing somthing here. Why is it wrong? Unless he is trying to recruit you, its perfectly normal to date.

[zDom]

also you should buy him ice cream.

LOL :)

[kicksindabank]

I promise to keep you posted.

[kicksindabank]

Ok, it has been a year since I posted this! Amazing. We are still friends and there it will be nothing more, nothing less.

Looking in back, I know our personalities would have clashed worst than two kanta swords. He is fire, I am water. Granted they create steam, but not in this case.

I have been focusing on my martial arts. Slacked a bit, but getting back into it hard core.

Thanks for all the comments! You guys rock.

[Drac]

A longtime friend of the opposite sex is also a rare and wonderous thing..I met this fantastic female through a friend and his girlfriend...We went out a few time and discovered despite having a lot in common we had too many differences, so we chose to remain friends..I remember her Birthday, Valentines Day etc..etc...we lunch together whenever we can..When I did the stage play "Dracula" in 1985 I sent a limo for her and we went out partying afterwards..

[Shaderon]

Yea I agree Drac, a friend of the opposite sex can be the best. Out of my four best friends, three of them are male and one of them is the closest friend I have. His wife hates it, my hubby hates it but with a friendship that strong you can't deny it.

I had a problem with being attracted to one of my instructors not that long ago,(not an MA instructor) he was single and I was married so it was really awkward at times, but I got over it with effort and we are really good pals now.

[Drac]

Yea I agree Drac, a friend of the opposite sex can be the best. Out of my four best friends, three of them are male and one of them is the closest friend I have. His wife hates it, my hubby hates it but with a friendship that strong you can't deny it.

Shortly after she got married she made the remark to her new husband about not hearing from me in awhile, he was made aware of me when they started dating.."I don't want you seeing him", was his response.."Why", she asked.."He's just trying to get in your pants". he answered.."Don't you think after 10 years he might have suceeded or we are JUST FRIENDS", was her answer..She recieved no response..

[Sukerkin]

Excellent riposte on your friends part, Drac :tup:.

I have had more than a couple of close female friends over the years and they have been wonderful to know. I have to admit, tho', that sometimes that 'friends only' desire has been one way (sometimes me, sometimes them) and that can create a lot of tension and emotional discomfort for a while until the situation becomes plain.

Despite that pitfall, a friend of the opposite sex can help you make sense of the world sometimes as they come at an issue from an entirely unexpected angle. That can be quite an eye-opener on occaision!

[Shaderon]

Excellent riposte on your friends part, Drac :tup:.

I have had more than a couple of close female friends over the years and they have been wonderful to know. I have to admit, tho', that sometimes that 'friends only' desire has been one way (sometimes me, sometimes them) and that can create a lot of tension and emotional discomfort for a while until the situation becomes plain.

Despite that pitfall, a friend of the opposite sex can help you make sense of the world sometimes as they come at an issue from an entirely unexpected angle. That can be quite an eye-opener on occaision!

Tell me about it! I've asked for a "mans view on such and such" from my friends so many times I think I qualify to be an honourary man on some occasions! :roflmao:

[Drac]

Tell me about it! I've asked for a "mans view on such and such" from my friends so many times I think I qualify to be an honourary man on some occasions! :roflmao:

They would ask a pretty female for a mans point of view??? That's not right..