View Full Version : Light Bulbs
Rob_Broad
03-07-2002, 10:33 AM
How many 9th degree Black Belts does it take to change a light bulb.
10. 1 to change it and 9 others to complain thatis not the way Master Parker taught them.
Rob_Broad
03-07-2002, 10:35 AM
How many 10th degree Black Belts does it take to change a ight bulb?
None, it is a 9th degree's job.
Originally posted by Rob_Broad
How many 10th degree Black Belts does it take to change a ight bulb?
None, it is a 9th degree's job.
None... they can see and fight in the dark.......¨
:D
/Yari
Rob_Broad
03-07-2002, 11:32 AM
Originally posted by Yari
None... they can see and fight in the dark.......¨
:D
/Yari
Sometimes that is true, but usually because they are blinded by their own limelight.
Originally Posted By: Rob Broad
How many 10th degree Black Belts does it take to change a light bulb?
None, it is a 9th degree's job.
If a kenpo white belt does it,
- 1 blackbelt to tell him to keep his elbow down when he does it.
- 1 2nd deg b.b. to remind him to check with the other hand
- 1 1 Tracy kenpoist to show him 5 other ways to screw it in
- 1 Greenbelt to quote the Infinite Insights In Lightbulb Screwing
- 1 Self acclaimed Grandmaster of XYZ Kenpo to tell him how his
method of lightbulb screwing in is ineffective
- 1 Chung Moo student to talk about how he knows the best way
to screw in a light bulb over anyone else, but can't show you
cause it's too deadly to the socket. He frequently tells stories
of how "Iron" Kim once put screwed in a thousand lightbulbs
in under a minute.
Originally posted by Kirk
If a kenpo white belt does it,
- 1 blackbelt to tell him to keep his elbow down when he does it.
- 1 2nd deg b.b. to remind him to check with the other hand
- 1 1 Tracy kenpoist to show him 5 other ways to screw it in
- 1 Greenbelt to quote the Infinite Insights In Lightbulb Screwing
- 1 Self acclaimed Grandmaster of XYZ Kenpo to tell him how his
method of lightbulb screwing in is ineffective
- 1 Chung Moo student to talk about how he knows the best way
to screw in a light bulb over anyone else, but can't show you
cause it's too deadly to the socket. He frequently tells stories
of how "Iron" Kim once put screwed in a thousand lightbulbs
in under a minute.
You forgot 1.....
Doing it with out hands!
/Yari
tonbo
04-08-2002, 06:11 PM
....if you are an intermediate ranking.....
--at least one higher belt telling you to try it on the "left" side
--now try it while you have someone breaking your concentration....
--now do it in full gear
--yes, but can you change it while sparring?
--no, only the "ideal phase" says you can use a chair, this is the "what if" phase....
--okay, there's the "test" way, and the "individual" way...do it the "test" way, unless you are out on the street....
--"What's the defense against someone changing a lightbulb?"
Hehe......more to come, if I get any more ideas from class..:)
Peace--
None....he forgot to pay the electric bill and the bulb is not the problem
Stickboxer
04-19-2002, 07:43 PM
Q: How many martial artists does it take to screw in a light-bulb?
All A: 100. One to do it and 99 to tell him he's not qualified.
Eskrima A: 100. One to do it and 99 to say he stole their technique.
Karate A: 100. One to do it and 99 to say they don't think people would really carry light bulbs.
Gung Ho A: 100. One to do it and 99 to say UFC lights are better.
BJJ A: 100. One to do it and 99 to say that lights on the ground would be better.
Kung Fu A: 100. One to do it and 99 to tell him to screw the bulb left and right to sync the Yin and Yang.
Aikido A: 100. One to do it and 99 to tell him to become one with the light bulb.
Wing Chun A: 100. One to do it and 99 to tell him to use more economical bulbs.
Ninjitsu A: Who needs lights?
tonbo
04-19-2002, 07:51 PM
Zen light bulb jokes, for those of you who have Zen as part of the practice.....
Q: How many zen students does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Two. One to change the lightbulb, and one to NOT change the lightbulb.
Q: How many zen MASTERS does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Tree in the Golden Forest.
Peace--
How many fat, redneck newbie kenpoists does it take?
Just one, (me). But I'll create a thread about it on here,
and get the opinion of kenpoists all around the world as
to the multiple variations of screwing it in, just to feed my
morbid curiosity :D
Rich Parsons
04-20-2002, 12:31 AM
You can only change the light bulb ...
If and only If it really wants to change on its'
own
:rofl:
Rich
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Kirk
[B]How many fat, redneck newbie kenpoists does it take?
Til you said newbie, I thought you knew me......
deadhand31
05-01-2002, 02:44 PM
how many computer programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
it can't be done.. it's hardware.
Originally posted by deadhand31
how many computer programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
it can't be done.. it's hardware.
You damned right!
Sure you can, hack into the electrical company's computers. Start alternating the electrical current so it creats a polar magnetic field and the light bulb will align itself float up and screw itself in.
Cthulhu
05-02-2002, 11:24 AM
But all magnetic fields are dipole...there isn't a magnetic monopole.
:D
Cthulhu
You only have to make the computer think it is.
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